Until recently I wouldn’t have considered myself a ‘political’ person. Aside from moaning every time Jeremy Hunt or Nicky Morgan did something to throw an enormous spanner into either my work or home life, I just kind of got on with it; reluctantly accepting that people who didn’t really know anything about the things they were responsible for were busy making bad decisions for me.
But then last month, 16 million of us started to think that some of those bad decisions might be very bad decisions, but it was alright, we were going to get the chance to stop them making a very bad decision before any damage was done. And as has become increasingly apparent, the people telling us that the very bad decision was a very good one expected us to stop them making it too, and now nobody is making any decisions at all because nobody knows what to actually do about it.
Instead, it is apparently a much better use of everybody’s time for those who want to make all future bad decisions to simply fight amongst themselves as they happily ‘stab each other in the back’ (a horrendously poor, if apt, choice of words I have seen being used many times, given the tragic loss of Jo Cox – but at least it was all without a shot being fired, eh Nigel?).
Calamity Gove, previous scourge of the teaching profession, has proved himself to be an even bigger contemptible shit than we had thought, by betraying the bumbling hairpiece that is Boris and painting himself as the saviour of the country, at the expense of his former partner in crime. If this were Game of Thrones, while Bo-dor conceded to hold the door, Gove has declared himself King and marches south to claim the Iron Throne. That’s if he can overthrow Queen Theresa, a woman for whom the word ‘formidable’ was invented.
[Hilariously, as I was writing this, I discovered that Gove had been asked following his leadership announcement which character in Game of Thrones he was most like. He declined to answer, but one obviously disgruntled Tory MP, who had been backing Boris, tweeted: “He is actually Theon Greyjoy, or will be by the time I’ve finished with him”. I’ll leave it to those of you who are familiar with the story to chuckle at what he’s referring to.]
And all the while, the opposition have themselves become consumed by in-fighting to the point of almost complete implosion, and the entire rest of the country are biding their time by either sniping at each other on social media or openly hurling racist abuse at innocent foreigners on public transport. We shouldn’t have to wear a safety pin to reassure fellow humans that we are not going to punch an immigrant the first chance we get (I know, I’m over-simplifying, and I appreciate it was a genuinely heartfelt idea).
As a Remain voter, I was incredulous to hear reports of Leave voters almost immediately regretting their choice as the full ramifications of the result started to become apparent. It is unfair that all Leave supporters have been branded either racist or stupid, as so many had their own perfectly valid personal reasons for voting that way which we should all respect, but I don’t think I’m mistaken in saying that a large majority was misled by the rhetoric and false promises of the Leave campaign.
They never thought they would have to follow through on any of it because they never expected to win. Whatever Johnson had in mind, it wasn’t actually garnering 17 million votes. He may have made a shambles of a bed, but we all now have to lie in it while he claims he shouldn’t be the one to sort out the dirty laundry. Thanks for that BoJo.
And so here we are, a country divided with an uncertain future. Will we fall apart or thrive? Will we stay in or go out? And will we all end up wearing creepy Guido masks and big cloaks as we watch the Houses of Parliament blow up as V for Vendetta becomes worryingly prophetic?
At this point anything is possible. But teachers are going out on strike again and the NHS still has no money, so some things don’t change. Oh, but don’t worry, there’ll be an extra £350m a week coming our way….oh, hang on, now Gove says it will be £100m…..by 2020…..I won’t hold my breath.
If this whole sorry mess has taught me anything, it’s that there is a ravenous appetite for change in this country – although people obviously have very different ideas of what that ‘change’ might look like. Regardless of how they voted in the referendum, people are sick and tired of being under the boot of those who only have their own interests at heart.
A change is needed and a change is coming. But if Michael Gove thinks he is the change the country needs, he’s as deluded as Boris ever was.